Life According To
by ReJo
Summary: What if Danny had never warmed up to Lindsay?  This story is told from the POV of different people in first person, for the most part alternating with the story told from the third person POV.  DL, Hawkes
1. Life According to Hawkes

**General/Romance**

**Life According To…**

**A/N: **For the purpose of this story, Aiden is still alive. What if Danny had never warmed up to Lindsay? This story is told from the POV of different people (first person), for the most part alternating with the story told from the third person POV. DL, HawkesOC

I hope you enjoy it. Please review.

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Summary: **Sheldon Hawkes is not only a student of science, but also a student of human nature. He observes his coworkers and takes notes of the good, the bad, and the ugly.

**Chapter 1: Life according to Hawkes**

During my lifetime I have met all kinds of people, though my career had my path crossing with quite a few deceased people. The mask of death that overtook them spoke to their last moments – some saw death coming, and others slipped away peacefully, almost welcoming death.

It's amazing how much of a person's story can be told by sifting through the contents of his stomach. People are such creatures of habit that the last meal is usually indicative of the person's lifestyle. Of course, the meal alone is only one piece of the puzzle. I came across a guy who was obviously homeless, but had caviar among his stomach contents. I should have been content to find the cause of his death – which was unnatural, by the way – but I wasn't. I wanted to know what led a 52 year old engineer to spend his last year roaming the streets of New York, only to end up in a dumpster in an alley covered in the adjoining business' refuse. By the time the CSIs learned that the fatal wound to his heart had gotten there because he was rummaging through the garbage, lost his footing and landed on a long, sharp metal rod, they had investigated his life and put together the pieces that I couldn't provide.

I decided to go into medicine to help others, and I loved figuring out medical mysteries. First, as a surgeon, which in theory was an exact fit, until the enormity of having a life slip away under my fingertips became unbearable. Then, I became a medical examiner. I enjoyed it until I realized that my friends who were CSIs got to play with more pieces of the puzzle. The next logical step was to become one myself.

My curiosity was only satiated when I found not only evidence, but clues into a victim's life. I'd like to think that I'm a student of humanity. The interactions between people have always intrigued me. I try not to judge, but there are some great lessons to be learned by paying attention to the way others live their lives.

For instance, when I first met Danny Messer, I couldn't help but be curious. I must say that I've learned a lot just by paying attention to him: 1) be loyal, 2) have self-confidence, 3) don't defy your boss, 4) pride always comes before a fall, 5) holding a grudge isn't useful, 6) growing up doesn't mean you lose your edge, and 7) love can be found where we least expect it.

While I'm at it, I might as well tell you that I've learned from all of my coworkers, Mac Taylor, Stella Bonasera, Lindsay Monroe, Don Flack, Sid Hammerback, and Adam Ross. From them I have learned: 1) stand up for what you believe in, 2) when you lose someone you love, grieve, but don't give up, 3) survivors should not feel guilty for surviving, 4) life is always worth living, 5) no matter how non-ending the fight is, always try to get the bad guy, 6) sometimes you have to work through the pain, and other times you have to know when to let others help you, 7) humor is beautiful in the face of ugliness, and 8) being a geek isn't a bad thing.

Now, you might wonder why I've concentrated so much on Danny. Well, let me tell you, he is a living paradox. He's as loyal as they come, but he's been known to flagrantly defy Mac's orders. He has a lot of self-confidence, one could even say that he's cocky, but he still longs for approval. His pride has gotten him in quite a lot of trouble, but when he finds something (or someone) he wants, he wears his heart on his sleeve. When it comes to him and Lindsay Monroe…well, let me put it this way…

7/11/07

**Next: Meet Hannah**


	2. Meet Hannah

**Life according to Hawkes**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Summary: ** Meet Hannah

**Chapter 2**

Danny hung up his phone as he and Lindsay sat at their respective desks. "Lindsay, it's me and you on a DB in Central Park," he said without making eye contact with her.

"Let's go."

This was going to be another cold day at work for Lindsay Monroe, despite the sweltering heat outside. Her reluctant partner had not warmed up to her, even after months of working together. If they weren't discussing cases, there was very little conversation going on between them. He took every opportunity to make fun of her in front of others, including saddling her with the nickname 'Montana.' He always acted as if he didn't want to be seen with her. It was a common scene for him to walk much faster than she did, with her double timing it, trying to keep up.

As usual, the ride to the crime scene was silent except for the radio. Danny always drove and he always chose which radio station they were going to listen to. Lindsay didn't have this problem with Sheldon Hawkes. Sheldon let her pick the station if she let him drive. For her, that was a no-brainer, as driving in New York was not in the least bit appealing.

As Danny parked, she unbuckled her seat belt and prepared to hop out of the uncomfortable chamber of silence. The voices of the police and the voyeurs were music to her ears – much better music than what her partner forced her to listen to.

Danny looked just as relieved as she did. He found that ignoring his partner was exhausting.

"What we got, Flack?"

Flack turned to face Danny. "Hey, Danny. Where's Monroe?" Just then, Lindsay walked up with her kit. She was a little breathless after speed walking while trying to keep up with Danny.

Although they were friends, Flack did not share Danny's dislike for Lindsay. She could be a bright spot in some very ugly situations, such as every scene they were called to. He knew why Danny kept his distance from Lindsay, but he felt as if he sometimes crossed the line from being aloof to being downright mean. It wasn't necessary to humiliate her, especially not in front of her coworkers.

"Morning, Lindsay. Nice of you to join us." Flack smiled at her and she rolled her eyes at him as she returned his smile.

"_Anyway_, our vic is Brenda Mullins. Harry Lempkus," he gestured to an elderly man in a jogging suit, "found her at 0700 while running with his seniors' club. She has bruises on her neck and, as you can see," he points to her torn stockings and high heel shoes, "she was dressed for a night out on the town, so she's probably been here for quite some time."

"Thanks Flack," Lindsay said with a frown. She set her kit down and began processing while Danny combed the perimeter.

"So, Lindsay, you coming out with us tonight?" Flack asked.

Lindsay had overheard Danny asking Stella earlier, so she knew that if he was going she wouldn't enjoy herself in his company, although she missed spending time outside of work with her other coworkers.

"No, I can't make it."

"Come on, Monroe. You can't keep depriving us of your company. I'm beginning to take it personally."

Lindsay smiled weakly. "Don't take it personally. I just have some things that I need to take care of, that's all." It was so tempting to go, but she knew that she'd be setting herself up for a night of humiliation at the hands of Danny.

Flack knew why she wasn't coming, but he tried to talk her into it anyway. He knew that Danny was no good at hiding his feelings, and even though he might find out later that he had wrongly characterized a person, he still didn't give everyone a fair shake. If he didn't like someone, that person usually knew it.

He got close to her and said in a hushed tone, "Look, Lindsay, if it's Danny that's bothering you, I'll make sure to keep him off your case tonight. Okay? Believe me, I've got the goods on him, so if he takes a shot at you, I'll take a shot at him. What do you say?"

"Don, I'm so tired of him humiliating me. I won't spend my off time that way. I'm not subjecting myself to it." Lindsay was very firm in her decision.

"I know, I know. Trust me, okay? He'll leave you alone, I promise. Besides, think of how much fun you'll have watching me embarrass him!"

Lindsay couldn't help but laugh at that prospect. "Flack…"

"One night, Lindsay. That's all I'm asking, and after that, we'll plan some Messer-less outings for the team. How's that?"

She sighed. "You've convinced me. What time?"

"Six o'clock. You sure you're going to be there?"

"Yes, Don."

"Ooh. You called me Don. I guess I'll leave you alone now." Lindsay light-heartedly smacked him on the arm.

**CSI:NY**

Lindsay walked into The Blue Room on Flack's arm. He had obviously said something funny and they both laughed. As they approached the table, Lindsay spotted Danny and her laughter stopped. Everyone said their hellos and Flack made sure that he and Lindsay sat together and that she wasn't seated next to Danny.

Stella was pleasantly surprised to see that Lindsay decided to join them – as much as she loved the guys, she was glad to have another female around. Besides, she and Lindsay got along very well.

"So, Lindsay, where's your cast?"

Lindsay knitted her brow in confusion. "What?"

"I know that Flack twisted your arm to get you to come out with us tonight."

"Very funny, Stella."

"But seriously, I'm happy you're here." She winked at Lindsay. "I thought you'd get to meet Aiden tonight since she and Danny are joined at the hip and he goes on and on about her all the time, but she couldn't make it. It's too bad. I think you would have liked her."

By the time she finished her sentence, they heard Danny say to the others with whom he was conversing, "Montana would know about that, eh? Nothing to do on the farm so you go for a roll in the hay…"

Flack's promise to protect Lindsay was not empty. "I'm sure that Lindsay wouldn't know about rolling in the hay, but you would know about rolling around in the locker room with a certain former FBI agent."

Everyone at the table got quiet and Danny's and Lindsay's eyes flew open. Danny couldn't believe that his friend would call him out like that. That was fine when it was just them ribbing each other, but having his business put in the streets in front of his boss and Lindsay threw him.

Don gave Danny a look that let him know that he had a lot more where that came from. Lindsay lowered her head because once the shock wore off, she had to fight hard to stifle her laughter. Flack was right – it was so worth it to witness Danny getting a taste of his own medicine.

**CSI:NY**

Danny had very little to say about anything after Don silenced him. He seemed to be a lot less cocky, and Lindsay enjoyed herself immensely. As long as Don was there, she would gladly go out with the team more.

Her phone rang and she flipped it open and turned away from the table to answer it.

"Monroe."

"_Lindsay?"_

"Yes," she answered cautiously.

"_I'm so hurt that you don't recognize my voice. It's Hannah."_

"Hannah? Oh, my goodness! How are you?"

"_I'm fine, Lindsay. Have you missed me?"_

"Of course I've missed you. It's been too long. Are you still in Montana?"

"_Are you kidding? I high-tailed it out of that god-forsaken place two years ago."_

"God-forsaken? Don't forget where you came from, Hannah."

"_If my intel is right, you've also gotten out of Dodge and haven't been back since."_

"You'd better believe it. I high-tailed it out of that god-forsaken place and I haven't looked back since!"

Both ladies laughed.

"Where are you now?"

"_Linds?"_

"Yeah?"

"_Turn around."_

"What?"

"_Turn around."_

Lindsay slowly turned around to face the door and spotted Hannah. She screamed, hopped out of her chair and ran to her, giving her a bear hug. Those at the table were startled by her scream and watched her as she ran to the unknown woman standing in the front of the restaurant.

After a lot more hugs, Lindsay walked Hannah back to the table to introduce her to everyone. Hannah was a beautiful woman with chocolate-colored skin and very short curly hair, not quite a fade, but very short. She stood about 5'4 and had curves in all the right places. She had on a red tank top with spaghetti straps and dark-wash boot-cut jeans. Men couldn't help but notice her, and the men at the table were no exception.

"Let me introduce you to my coworkers. Starting at my right, there's Don Flack, Danny Messer, Mac Taylor, Stella Bonasera, and Sheldon Hawkes. Guys, this is Hannah Miller."

Sheldon stood up and extended his hand to Hannah, which she took.

"Hannah. That's a beautiful name for a beautiful lady."

Hannah smiled coyly. It was obvious that there was a mutual attraction between the two. Hawkes still had not let go of her hand.

"Nice to meet you, Sheldon." Neither could suppress their smiles.

"Have a seat." Sheldon gestured to his seat so that Hannah could sit down and quickly grabbed a chair from the empty table adjacent to theirs and pulled it over to the table and sat down. While doing all of this, he barely took his eyes off of her.

Lindsay saw the attraction between Hawkes and Hannah, but she wanted to catch up with her friend.

"Hannah, what brings you to New York? Business or pleasure?"

"Business. I've set up a private practice here. I provide a service that I thought a lot of New Yorkers could use."

"Psychotherapy."

"Exactly."

Everyone at the table nodded their heads in agreement.

Sheldon tried to hide his excitement upon hearing the news that Hannah was in town for good.

"This is great. I have another friend in New York! You're going to have to come over for a girl's night. Stella and I try to have one every other week."

"Sounds great. It will be great to catch up."

As they talked, they realized that Hannah's new office was in a building close to the lab.

Hannah and Danny made eye contact; he was the only one who hadn't said much since she'd arrived. "Your name's Danny, right?" He nodded. "Are you always this quiet?"

He just shrugged while the others stifled a laugh. She looked at Lindsay curiously and Lindsay whispered, "I'll explain later."

7/11/07

**Next: Life According to Flack**


	3. Life According to Flack

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Summary: **Don Flack, Jr., hates criminals and liars. He's a stand-up guy who believes in being up front about everything.

**Chapter 3: Life according to Flack**

I hate criminals. I can't hide that fact. Being the son of Don Flack, Sr., I can't help but feel that way. My dislike for their life choices comes through during my interrogation as well as the foot pursuit that usually precedes the interrogation. Did I mention that I hate it when they run?

Growing up with my father prepared me for working with Mac Taylor. They have a similar passion for justice even when it means that one of our own has to go down. I admire them for defending the integrity of the badge although it's never easy to cuff one of your own.

Being Don Flack, Jr., is like living under a microscope. First, I've always had to be on the straight and narrow or risk being on the receiving end of my father's wrath. Do you have any idea what it's like having every cop in the city knowing who you are and reporting your comings and goings to your father? My father wasn't just a regular beat cop – everyone knew him. Of course, I didn't make it to my 21st birthday totally unscathed, but I didn't get into too much trouble.

There was this one time – I know I'll regret telling you this – that my buddies and I were bored. We were teenage hockey jocks (all sons of cops) with nothing better to do, so we decided to have some fun. This 'fun' involved beer, which, seeing that we were teenagers, we were too young to buy or to drink. Let's just say that we didn't buy the beer, but we wound up in possession of it. Although we thought that we were smarter than our parents, it turned out that we weren't. Our private party was discovered, and my father had us locked up for hours after being interrogated separately. My friends were under the impression that they would only have to deal with their own fathers, but they didn't count on Don Sr. orchestrating their punishment. I don't know how he did it, but for the rest of the summer we had to report to the jail and spend eight hours a day in separate cells. I didn't drink again until I was twenty-five.

Every now and then my coworkers and I get together to drink, but a lot of times it's just Danny and I. We see eye-to-eye on most things, especially our disdain for criminals. Hanging out with him is a great stress-reliever; he's a fun guy – at least most people think he is. Sometimes we meet women and go out on dates, but his big mouth has gotten him a reputation that he doesn't deserve. He makes himself out to be a ladies' man, but he never has been; he's a one-woman man. Danny likes to look. What man doesn't? When a pretty woman passes by, his eyes are right behind her. But that doesn't mean that he's interested in doing any more than looking, especially if she isn't a certain type of girl. Ever since he got his heart broken a few years ago, he hasn't really dated at all, but he still talks a good game, thus, the reputation persists.

**CSI:NY**

Now, the other night when the team went out, Danny left me no choice but to come to Lindsay's aid. I've known him long enough to know that his pride was hurt after what I said. I guess it didn't hurt that I never liked Beth, so I didn't mind dragging her into this. She was an FBI agent, but she was also a good-time girl, if you know what I mean. Danny knew what she was about – she was definitely not his type – and he was still faithful to her while she provided him with a temporary distraction.

Danny can usually take a ribbing as well as he can give it, but this was an exception. I know why he has it out for Lindsay, but that doesn't mean that it's right. She's a great woman who is tough and sweet and in no way deserves that kind of treatment. That's what upsets me so much. I hope that he gets the point to back off of her, although knowing how thick his head is, I'm sure it's going to take a while to fully get that point across. He'll at least keep his mouth closed while _I'm_ around. To really get him in line, I'm going to have to eventually enlist the assistance of The Big Gun: Aiden Burn.

**Next: Hannah and Hawkes' date; Lindsay meets someone**


	4. Double Date

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Summary: ** Hannah and Hawkes' date; Lindsay meets someone

**Chapter 4**

**CSI:NY**

Sheldon spotted Lindsay walking down the hallway and took off after her.

"Lindsay!"

Lindsay stopped in her tracks and turned on her heels to wait for Sheldon to reach her.

"Lindsay, I have a favor to ask of you."

"Does the favor have anything to do with _Hannah_?" Lindsay chuckled.

Sheldon grinned. "You and Hannah, actually."

"Sheldon, if you want to take her out, you don't need me to chaperone…"

"I don't want a chaperone. She agreed to go out with me already, but I think it will be easier to get to know her with you around."

"So, you're using me?"

"No, I'm not using you. You'll have a good time, too. I promise."

Lindsay shook her head. "I don't think so. I'll feel like a third wheel."

"Come on, Lindsay. You won't be a third wheel. It'll be like old friends hanging out."

"Yeah, but two of them will be trying to mate. No thank you."

"Look, we'll find a date for you so that you don't feel left out."

Lindsay eyed him suspiciously. "Who?"

Sheldon couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. "I'll get back to you on that." He turned and left with a bounce in his step.

Lindsay called out to him, "You didn't even tell me when!"

He turned briefly and walked backwards as he spoke, "Friday night at 7."

Lindsay turned around and continued in the direction she was going and called over her shoulder, "Don't make a habit out of this. I'm trying to get a life of my own, you know."

Lindsay didn't believe that this set-up had any potential, but she was looking forward to getting out of her apartment, if only for one night.

**CSI:NY**

The dinner went well – it was obvious that Sheldon and Hannah had hit it off. The fact that they were on a double date was obviously lost on them, as they were only into each other and they barely touched their food.

Lindsay's date, Stephen, was a friend of Hannah's. He was quite a bit taller than Sheldon, standing about 5'11. He had piercing green eyes and brown hair that complemented his olive complexion. He and Hannah had shared a practice in Montana and decided to make the big move to New York.

It was a good thing that Stephen was there or Lindsay would have been a very ignored third wheel. Fortunately, they got along well and when their time together came to an end, he asked if he could see her again. They exchanged phone numbers and he promised to call her. She knew that if he didn't call, she'd call him.

Many people thought that she was very shy, but she had never been a wall flower – she always joined the party and went after what she wanted. She hated rejection as much as the next person did, but she'd rather get in the game and find out that someone didn't feel the same way about her than sit on the sidelines wondering if she had let an opportunity pass her by.

**Next: Life According to Stella**


	5. Life According to Stella

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Chapter 5: ****Life According To ****Stella**

If there's one thing that I hate, it's people who can't get past the past. Goodness knows that I have a past that no one would want: a childhood spent in an orphanage and foster homes, an abusive boyfriend, and those are just the things that my coworkers know about. Where would I be if I never allowed myself to get past these things? Granted, some people have much worse memories than I have, but I always knew that I didn't want my past to define my future.

Take Mac, for instance. He lets his past keep him from pursuing a relationship and he buries himself in his work. He hasn't allowed himself to get past his wife's death. I know what it's like to lose someone, but even after all I've been through, I can't imagine that any heartbreak would be worse than not allowing yourself to experience love again. Nobody likes being vulnerable, but it is part of the human experience.

I think of Hawkes who gave up being a surgeon because he couldn't bear to lose patients. To me, that's different, because he was certainly going to lose other patients. I think that he made the right decision for _him_. Thank goodness all surgeons don't feel that way, or we'd be in a bit of a mess, wouldn't we?

Now Danny…what can I say about him? He's a prime example of one who can't seem to move past his past. One heartbreak and it was all over. He's never been the same since then. He really thought he had found the love of his life. I'm sure we all know what that's like, unfortunately, but to close yourself off to the possibility of finding love again? I can't imagine. I've lived my life being rejected and it never occurred to me that I should just cut myself off from trying to find love just for the sake of protecting my heart.

Danny has become a bit bitter toward some females – no, one female in particular, even though she had nothing to do with his heartbreak. I know exactly why she's the object of his torment; he seems to get some kind of perverted enjoyment from humiliating her.

I _know_ that I am not perfect. I know this well. But I do try to treat others with decency and respect, as do most of my coworkers. But Danny Messer is another story. He has it in for Lindsay and he tries to publicly humiliate her as much as possible. Well, last week, Flack had her back. Danny made a comment about her knowing about rolling in the hay. Flack made my day, as well as hers, I'm sure, when he shut Danny up by bringing up one of his escapades in front of us. Oh, well. Now he knows how he made Lindsay feel.

I really feel for her because she came here with a very positive attitude expecting to get along with everyone, but instead she became the target of all of Danny's misguided frustrations and she doesn't know why. She tries hard to hide it, but I can tell that she's fed up with him, and so are the rest of us. Flack has proposed that we all go out without Danny so that she doesn't feel like such an outcast.

I'm sure that Lindsay has had her heart broken, probably by some studly cowboy, but she's been out on dates and isn't even afraid to make the first move. She doesn't bar hop or anything like that, but she keeps her options open.

Her friend Hannah, who's beautiful and smart and who is obviously the apple of Sheldon's eye, set her up with a friend of hers last Friday. When she came back to work she was glowing. It didn't take much for me to get her to give up the goods on Stephen. He sounds like a good catch – not only is he good-looking, intelligent, and successful, but as a psychotherapist, it's his job to know how to listen well.

**CSI:NY**

Yes, I know that 'studly' is not a word. I like making up words. LOL

Please review!

**Next: Life According to Hannah**


	6. Life According to Hannah

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

** A/N: Thanks to Linnie22 and Daytimedrama for letting me know that 'studly' is a word :) I should have done my homework. Now, I wonder who that word could possibly apply to... Any ideas??  
**

**Summary:** Hannah's thoughts about Danny

**Chapter 6 - ****Life According To ****Hannah**

_A few weeks later…_

It was a Tuesday evening when Lindsay called me.

"_Hannah, do you and Sheldon want to come over Saturday night? I'm going to host a little get-together for the team at my place."_

"Sure. We were trying to figure out what we were going to do that night anyway. Do you need me to bring anything?"

"_Nope. Just yourselves."_

"Are you inviting your _friend_?"

"_Of course Stephen's coming."_

"I'm not talking about Stephen. I'm talking about your 'friend' Danny." I knew that I was getting under her skin. I had a bad day – I needed the laugh.

"_Don't even say his name! Why would I invite him anywhere, let alone into my home? That would be like…like… inviting a mugger to appraise my valuables! I'd be begging for him to take advantage of the situation. As if I'd invite him over just to have him make me uncomfortable in my own home…. Never!"_

I couldn't help but let out a hearty laugh.

"I'm just kidding, Linds. Calm down." I needed to try to placate her now that she was riled up. I still think this whole situation is very funny. Danny isn't the quiet guy I thought he was the first night I met him. He's a good guy with a great sense of humor who, for some reason, is always ragging on Lindsay. If I remember correctly, he _is_ her type of guy: smart, funny, _good-looking_, spontaneous, and attentive. Too bad he's such a jerk to Lindsay, or they might actually have something. I've had clients like him, and I have to believe that something about her strikes a chord with him; she gets to him. I can't figure out why, yet, but I'd love to watch them interact That's very unlikely because they so rarely make a public appearance together outside of work.

I wonder if Sheldon knows why he acts so harshly toward Lindsay. I'll have to see if he can find out what information he can gather on Danny's past. I'm sure it has nothing to do with Lindsay, but has everything to do with _some_ woman who, I'm sure, broke his heart. It's too much to ask for her to invite him to her gathering just so I could pick his brain, but if things somehow worked out that way…

**Next: Lindsay's Party**


	7. Lindsay's Party

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Summary: **Lindsay's party

**Chapter 7**

The guests began trickling in and Lindsay and Stephen greeted their guests. Stella and her date, Mac by himself, Hawkes and Hannah, Flack and his date, Sid and his wife, Adam and his…whatever, Danny and his date…

_Wait…What??? _Lindsay couldn't help the look of horror that crossed her face when Danny entered her apartment with a dark-haired woman.

Before she could greet them, he stated, "Guess my invitation got lost in the mail, eh, Montana?"

The dark-haired woman popped him on his arm and made a face at him.

"Umm, yeah, I guess so." Lindsay was fooling no one; she was not amused by his presence.

The woman with Danny glared at him, then extended her hand and smiled at Lindsay. "Hi, _Lindsay_. I'm Aiden. I've heard a lot about you. Sorry about the grief this one," she used her thumb to point at Danny in a very aggravated manner, "gives you. If you ever need me to set him straight, tell Flack. He'll find me and I'll take care of him."

Lindsay smiled and nodded. She didn't know what to make of Aiden; she knew that Danny talked about her all of the time, and although he never explicitly said that she was his girlfriend, he spoke of her with such affection that it led her to believe that he and Aiden were together.

"I might have to take you up on that." She rolled her eyes at a shocked-looking Danny and smiled at Aiden. She pointed to the dining table. "The food and drinks are right there."

Stephen walked over to them, shook Danny's hand, and introduced himself while placing his arm around Lindsay's waist protectively.

"So, you're Stephen. We've all heard a lot about you," Danny said.

"And I've heard a lot about you, too." Stephen's voice was kind, yet warning. Lindsay had told him about how Danny treated her, but to Aiden it seemed more like jealousy. He turned to Aiden, who was confused by his reaction to Danny.

"Hi, I'm Aiden Burn. Nice to meet you." She obviously hadn't learned the art of the fake smile. She was getting a bad vibe off of Stephen.

**CSI:NY**

Flack spotted Aiden and walked over to her, bringing her some fruit punch to butter her up before enlisting her help. Danny had found his way over to Stella to meet her new boyfriend and Flack's girlfriend, Tanya, was getting to know Lindsay and Hannah, so they would be free to talk.

"Hey, Flack. What's going on?"

"Your boy, Danny. I think it's time for some backup."

The two friends slipped into Lindsay's bedroom unnoticed to talk.

Aiden knew her former coworker too well. "Does this have anything to do with Lindsay? I can't believe he invited me to a party that he knew he wasn't invited to. What's going on, Flack?"

Flack exhaled heavily. "You know how Danny is. And, yes, it has everything to do with Lindsay." Aiden closed her eyes and nodded her head knowingly. "He's giving her a hard time and he likes to humiliate her in front of people." He went on to relate a few of the instances to Aiden, and all she could do was hold her head in her hands and shake her head.

"Does she remind you of…"

Flack just nodded.

"Oh, boy. I thought he was over that."

"I guess she just brought it all back."

"So do you think that he's…"

"Yep. He'll never admit it though."

They both sighed. "I'll work on him."

"He's getting bad, Aid. Please work your magic on him. Soon."

"I'll see if I can get through his thick skull." Aiden quickly shifted gears. "Soooo.. What do you think about Stephen?"

It was obvious to Flack that she was fishing, and he decided to take the bait.

"He's ummm…Well, every time I try to talk to Lindsay, he swoops down like a vulture. He did that to Mac, too. You should have seen the look on Mac's face." The mental image threw them both into a fit of giggles.

"Do you think he's…"

"I don't know, Aid."

"Hmmm…maybe I'll have a little talk with Lindsay too."

**CSI:NY**

On their way home, Danny was very quiet, whereas usually he freely gave his opinion on everything from baseball to international politics. Aiden found his silence very disturbing.

"Out with it, Danny."

"What?" She had shaken him out of his own little world.

"Why are you so quiet?"

"Just thinking."

"About what…or _whom_?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Nothing. You know, Lindsay's a nice girl."

"Yeah, she is," he said distractedly. "So, what do you think about Stephen?" he blurted out.

"I…I don't know. What do _you_ think about Stephen?" She couldn't wait to hear his reply, and she tried to hide her amusement.

"There's something about him. He seems a bit… controlling. At least he seems to have controlling tendencies, don't you think?"

Aiden looked at him and pursed her lips. "Yeah, I think."

"I mean, what does Lindsay see in him? He doesn't seem like her type anyway. He's boring as hell and has no sense of humor."

At this point, Aiden realized that Danny was not looking for input from her and she was content to just listen to him rant about Lindsay's boyfriend.

"Montana doesn't like that clean-shaven choir boy look. She likes a man with some scruff – you know, a _manly_ look. He's just a pretty boy. She doesn't like that. It's not gonna last."

He finally remembered that Aiden was beside him in the subway car, and he looked over to her to find her trying her best not to laugh at him.

"What?"

"You."

"What about me?"

"Look at how you're going on and on about Lindsay's boyfriend and how he's not her type…"

"He's not!"

"…and all I want to know is why you're so concerned. I mean you treat her like dirt…"

"You been talking to Flack…"

"…and now you're going on and on about what kind of man she likes…"

"…don't listen to Flack, he doesn't know what he's talking about..."

"…which, by the way, fits you to a tee."

He furrowed his brow in confusion. "_What?" _

She raised her voice out of frustration, "You're saying that _you're_ her type!"

He raised his voice to match hers. "I never said that!" The few stragglers on the subway never flinched; they were used to loud, crazy people on the subway.

"Scruffy, good sense of humor, not boring."

"That could be anyone."

"Including you. Tell me, why are you so, ummm, _passionate_ about the type of man _Montana_ is dating?"

"I'm just concerned, that's all. We've all seen relationships turn abusive. I'm just looking out for her, that's all."

"To say that you're so concerned, you certainly like annoying her."

He shrugged. "I annoy everybody."

"And what was up with you crashing her party _and__bringing me as a guest?" _

Danny grinned, proud of himself for being so bold. "I was, too, invited." He lowered his voice. "Just…not…by…Montana."

* * *

_Hawkes sidle up to Danny in the lab. "So, Messer, are you bringing a date to the party tonight?"_

_Danny looked at him in a way that signaled that he didn't know what he was talking about._

"_What party?"_

"_You don't know about Lindsay's party? We've all been invited."_

"_Oh. That's tonight? I totally forgot about it." He tried to cover the fact that he hadn't been invited and was deeply disappointed. "What time is it for? I've been so busy I forgot."_

"_Seven thirty. You didn't answer my question. Are you bringing a date?"_

"_Yeah, yeah," he answered distractedly. He knew who he was bringing. He was not going to miss the opportunity to see Montana on her own turf. And the look on her face when he showed up was sure to be priceless.  
_  
"_I'll see you tonight, man."_

"_Yeah, see you tonight."_

_Hawkes waited until Danny was out of sight and dialed Hannah's number._

"_Hello."_

"_Hannah?"_

"_Is it done?"_

"_Mission accomplished. But remember, don't tell Lindsay I was involved."_

"_Ditto. Bye, Sweetie."_

* * *

"Messer, you're just obnoxious. And incorrigible. I don't know why I bother."

He laid his head on her shoulder. "'Cause you love me."

Aiden looked down at him and couldn't help but chuckle along with him.

"So, _Love_…does Lindsay remind you of anyone?"

"Nope. She's one of a kind. There's only _one_ Montana."

Aiden smirked and chose to drop the subject for the time being, mentally formulating her game plan.

**Next: Life According to Aiden**


	8. Life According to Aiden

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Chapter 8: Life According To Aiden **

Danny is an idiot. He's my best friend, but he's an idiot. First, he invites me to a party that he's not invited to, and as a matter of fact, he knew that he was not invited. So I go in acting like nothing's wrong, as if I had received an engraved invitation. I was _not_ pleased when I realized we had crashed. When I saw the look on Lindsay's face, it was quite apparent that neither of us was expected. She was too polite to kick us out, but it was obvious that she would have preferred that we hadn't been there. Of course, Danny acted as if the party was thrown in his honor. Did I mention that he's an idiot?

First, I notice that Lindsay reminds me of someone. Not so much her looks as her demeanor. You see, a few years ago, Danny had this girlfriend, Lauren, who was from Iowa, or some place on the range. She was sweet as pie, and nobody could believe that she and Danny were together. Little did they know that she was his type. Sure, the women he _said_ he dated were a totally different type, which is why everyone was shocked when Lauren showed up on his arm. She obviously wasn't a native New Yorker. (When I made the comment that she still had straw between her teeth, Danny wasn't too amused.) They did everything together, and I must say that he was in love. Danny in love is nothing like Danny not in love, so that was a great time for all of us. He had a more agreeable sense of humor and he was so much fun to tease.

Danny and Lauren got engaged and they were planning their wedding. Shortly after, his past came back to haunt him in the form of some goons who decided to intimidate her to get him to pay off some of Louie's debts. Lauren high-tailed it out of there so fast that his head spun. I can't say that I blame her. If I wasn't in law enforcement, having thugs come after me might make me run too.

Then there was Stephen, Lindsay's overprotective boyfriend. I distinctly noticed him pull her closer when he saw her talking to other men. He could be trouble. She should be very careful with him. I need to have a talk with her about Stephen. I think he's bad news – there's a very thin line between over protectiveness and abuse, and I've seen it crossed too many times.

I also need to talk to her about Danny to explain what his problem is. I know that he's attracted to her, especially after our conversation on the subway, but he doesn't want to be. He feels himself falling for her and he's fighting it tooth and nail. He has to make things so difficult. I understand that his heart was ripped out, but most people have had that experience and eventually recover from it. I mean, look at Stella. She had to _kill_ her abusive boyfriend, but she's back in the game with a new guy. Why can't he just let nature take its course? I'll tell you why – he actually thinks he has a choice over who he falls in love with. Like I said – he's an idiot.

**Next: Aiden and Lindsay Have a Talk**


	9. Aiden and Lindsay Talk

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Summary: **Aiden and Lindsay talk

**Chapter 9**

Lindsay was surprised to get a call from Aiden since she had only heard of her through others and had spent limited time with her at her own party. She couldn't figure out what she could want to talk to her about.

Aiden seemed to be Danny's type, so it was no surprise that they were together, but she seemed to be a lot kinder and more polite than Danny was.

Lindsay met her at one of her favorite places, Panera Bread. Aiden was sitting at an outside table waiting for her with a smile on her face. They greeted each other and Aiden took note of Lindsay's curious look, so she got to the point.

"Thanks for meeting with me, Lindsay. There are a couple of things that I have to talk to you about."

"Oooookay," Lindsay said slowly.

Aiden couldn't help but laugh at the hesitation in Lindsay's tone.

"First, I know that we don't really know each other, but I think that we need to have a talk – woman-to-woman."

_Uh-oh. Any talk that starts with 'woman-to-woman' could _not _be good. That usually means someone is suspected of cheating with another's mate. I hope she doesn't think I have a thing for Danny!_

"I want to talk to you about Danny."

_Uh-oh_. She definitely did not want to have this conversation, or any other conversation about him.

"I hear that Danny hasn't been treating you very well."

Lindsay was too shaken to respond verbally, so she nodded.

"I'm sorry to hear he's been giving you a rough time, but I want to talk to you so that you understand why he acts the way he does."

_What? She's apologizing for him? _Lindsay was torn between hearing the reason why Danny was such a jerk to her, which she was sure would provide many laughs, or not wasting anymore time, telling Aiden that it really wasn't necessary, and leaving. She thought that the polite thing would be to hear her out. But first, she'd let her know how she felt about Danny.

"I'm not trying to be rude, but you really don't have to apologize for Danny's actions. He's a grown man and if he doesn't like me, that's fine. I'm not too crazy about him at this point, but I try to show him more respect than he shows me. Believe me, you have my deepest sympathy for having Danny as a boyfriend."

Aiden laughed heartily, almost falling off of her chair, which baffled Lindsay.

"What's so funny?" Lindsay did not like being laughed at.

When Aiden regained her composure she asked, "You think that Messer," she couldn't finish her sentence before she fell out laughing again. "Messer and I," she laughed, "we're boyfriend, " more laughter, "and girlfriend?" She teetered on the edge of her chair, trying to control her laughter.

Now Lindsay was thoroughly confused. "You don't…But he talks about you all the time and you always go out together…and I guess I jumped to the wrong conclusion, didn't I?"

Aiden nodded as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Wait 'til Flack hears this. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to laugh, but just the thought..." She got serious. "I can't imagine what was going through your mind when I invited you here today. What was going through your mind?"

Lindsay was at a loss for words. She shrugged and said, "I had no idea what you wanted to talk about."

Aiden looked at her and shook her head. "If you thought Danny and I were an item, you're going to fall out of your seat when I tell you what I came to tell you. You ready?"

Lindsay wasn't so sure she wanted to know anymore, but she nodded anyway.

"Okay." She paused for what seemed like an eternity. "Let me tell you a story about a boy and a girl."

"Let me guess – Danny's the boy." Lindsay grinned.

Aiden's eyebrows rose high. "The CSI mind at work is a beautiful thing." They both laughed.

Aiden proceeded to tell Lindsay about Danny and Lauren.

"This brings me to one of the reasons why I asked you here today. " She looked Lindsay straight in the eye and said, "You thought that Danny and I were going together, but I can assure you that I am not Danny's type – _you_ are."

Lindsay's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. "What?? I'm sorry, I think you have me confused with someone else. Hello? Lindsay Monroe here, the one Danny loves to torment."

"I know that it sounds crazy. I know that, but I've known Danny for a long time and he _is_ my best friend. You're his type. I think Danny Messer is in love with you, and he's in denial about it. What he doesn't realize is that you can't choose who you fall in love with."

"You are sadly mistaken, Aiden. You've read him wrong."

"I don't think so. Have you ever noticed that you're the only one he gives a hard time? There's a reason."

Lindsay was not buying Aiden's argument. "There's no way, Aiden. No way. He hates me, and besides, I have a boyfriend. You met Stephen."

"Yeah, I did." She paused while she gathered her thoughts. "That's the other thing I want to talk to you about."

"Stephen?"

"Yes, Stephen. I noticed the other night that he seems a bit…clingy."

"Yeah, he can be a little jealous at times. He's a nice guy, though." Lindsay thought about the times when she and Stephen went out on dates and other men gave her 'the look.' He would shut down and their evening out was usually ruined because they would invariably argue about his jealousy. She put up with him because their good times together were very good and she had missed having male companionship, but she was quickly becoming fed up with him, although she wasn't about to tell that to Aiden.

"I know that it's not my place, but I just want you to be careful. We've all seen men go from 'clingy' to 'abusive' and it can seem to come out of nowhere."

Lindsay nodded her head. "Oookay." _Why is she so concerned about me?_

An uncomfortable silence ensued.

"So, is that all we have to talk about?"

Aiden chuckled. "Yeah, I guess. Hey, do you want to go out later? Danny, Flack and I are going dancing tonight."

Lindsay shook her head.

"Oh, come on. I want you to see another side of Danny, and believe me, with Flack and I there, Danny wouldn't dare be the idiot that I know he can be."

Lindsay again shook her head. "No, but thanks for the invitation."

"You're still not buying that Danny has feelings for you?"

"Nope. And even if he does, he treats me badly and I am not volunteering to be subjected to that."

Aiden sighed. "Alright, Lindsay. The way I see it, I paid for your lunch, so you owe me a night out." She cocked one eyebrow up to let her know that she wasn't giving her a choice. Lindsay closed her eyes as she dropped her head to concede defeat.

**CSI:NY**

After leaving Lindsay, Aiden met up with Flack so that they could knock some sense into Danny, idiot that he was.

"Hey, you're early." Danny looked at his friends curiously while letting them in his apartment.

"How very observant of you, Oh Wise One," Flack mused.

Aiden did not beat around the bush. "Have a seat, Danno, we have to have a talk with you."

Aiden and Flack confronted Danny about his feelings for Lindsay, which he vehemently denied.

"Danny, everybody knows how you feel about her. You can't deny it forever."

"I'm not denying anything, Aiden. Just because I went out with Lauren and she was a country girl does _not_ mean that I'm going after every country girl that comes my way. I don't have 'a thing' for Lindsay, okay? We just work together."

"And you pay special attention to her because…"

"Because I get a kick out of aggravating her. It's what I do!"

Flack and Aiden looked at him incredulously.

"Whatever, man. Look, the sooner you admit your feelings for Ms. Monroe, the sooner we can get you to stop tormenting her. I have to tell you, Mac's not too impressed with the way you're treating her."

And on and on it went, round after round of Flack and Aiden accusing Danny of having feelings for Lindsay, and Danny denying it.

Before long, it was time to meet Lindsay at the club. Neither Lindsay nor Danny would make eye contact with the other. They greeted each other shyly, with Danny trying to remember to call her 'Lindsay' and not 'Montana.'

Flack and Aiden pretty much ignored the silent pleas for help their comrades were giving them and immediately abandoned them for the dance floor.

Aiden and Flack danced and spurned the advances of anyone who tried to interfere in their conversation.

"So, how long do you think they're just going to sit there looking at each other?"

Flack shrugged. "Don't know, don't care. I'm having fun. Danny can be as stubborn as he wants – he's not fooling anybody. If you ask me…"

"Oh, look! I think they're going to dance together…Way to go, Messer!"

Danny led Lindsay to the floor and they danced to an upbeat song, although they were so far apart they almost didn't seem to be together. Danny was sneaking looks at Lindsay as she moved rhythmically and worked up a sweat, which he couldn't deny was a turn-on. Lindsay wasn't innocent either. She stole glances at Danny which led her to thinking not-so-platonic thoughts about him and the way his rhythm could be put to other uses. He was a jerk, but he was a man, after all. She had to keep reminding herself that she had a boyfriend.

After a few songs they headed toward a table to catch their breath. They continued to steal quick glances at each other, smiling when caught.

At the same time they both spoke.

"Lindsay – "

"Danny – "

They laughed and Danny gestured for Lindsay to continue.

"Thanks for the dance, Danny. I don't get out too much because Stephen doesn't have much time away from his practice, but I love dancing."

"No problem. I usually get to come out a couple of times a month with Aiden and Flack, but they don't usually ditch me the way they did tonight."

"I think they had ulterior motives."

"Yes, I think they do. They don't do 'subtle' very well. So tell me, do you at least get free therapy?"

"Why? Do you think I need it?" Lindsay pretended to be upset.

"No, no, no! I was just…"

Lindsay laughed. "I'm just kidding, Danny. I know what you mean. Sometimes he slips into 'therapist' mode and I have to remind him that I'm not one of his clients, but other than that, we're a normal couple. He _is_ a good listener, though."

Danny nodded and they both tried to think of something else to say.

"You know, I thought you and Aiden were a couple."

"A couple of what?" he asked jokingly.

"I'm serious. As much as you talk about her, and you're always with her, I just thought…"

She was interrupted by his laughter and began to laugh herself, remembering how Aiden couldn't contain herself earlier that day when she heard the conclusion that Lindsay had jumped to.

"No, Ms. Burn and I are not an item. I am currently unattached."

"Oh." Why did her heart leap when she heard that? Wasn't he her arch nemesis?

Flack approached with a grin on his face, slightly out of breath. "So, you two seem to be getting along better."

They nodded and smiled, trying to wrap their heads around the fact that they weren't at each other's throats – a first for them. But after so much time, they still were unsure how long their truce would last, so they decided to be very cautious with the other.

Aiden was perspiring and breathing hard. "Alright, you two. Can one of you be a gentleman and get a couple of ladies a drink?"

Danny got up and made his way over to the bar through the tight mass of people who had somehow crammed into the building and waited his turn to place his order.

Flack and Aiden's eyes lit up as Aiden leaned in to ask, "So, Lindsay, I see that you and Danny are getting along. You even danced!"

Lindsay smiled. "You two are very obvious, you know. Yes, we've been civil to each other tonight."

Flack's eyes danced. "That's a first for you two, right?"

Lindsay rolled her eyes. "Laugh it up, you guys. I don't know what you did, but it will be nice to go to work without the fear of being verbally attacked." She looked at Aiden with suspicion. "But that doesn't mean that I believe you, Aiden."

"Believe what?" Flack asked.

"She doesn't believe that Danny has the hots for her."

"She doesn't know Messer very well – yet. Give her time. Danny's not known for being subtle."

"You all are forgetting that I already have a boyfriend. Remember Stephen?"

Aiden rolled her eyes. "How could we forget?"

Lindsay was getting very comfortable with Aiden, otherwise she would have told her something about getting in her business. "He is quite amazing, isn't he?" She knew that she was getting under Aiden's skin.

"Yeah, he's a prize, alright," Aiden retorted sarcastically.

"Aaaannnnyyyywaaayyy," said Lindsay to change the subject, "You've met my friend, Hannah, right? She introduced me to Stephen and they're friends."

"Give me five minutes and I can change that." Aiden winked at Lindsay and they both smiled.

**CSI:NY**

While in her bed, Lindsay allowed her mind to wander over the day. Her mother had always impressed upon her the importance of having a solid network of female friends, and now she felt as if she had one more to add to that network – Aiden. Little did she know how much she would need her friends in the upcoming weeks.

**Next: Life According to Mac**


	10. Life According to Mac

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Chapter 10: ****Life According To ****Mac **

My military background has prepared me for many things: combat, negotiations, character assessment, interrogations, and, yes, empathy. I think that most of my coworkers don't think I am capable of expressing human emotions, but every emotion has a time and a place. If I did not have empathy, I could not do my job well, possibly not at all. After all, if I did not feel the victims' pain, I would not be as driven as I am to solve these cases, especially when all the leads go cold.

I must admit that I have a hard time _displaying_ emotions; since I lost Claire, I fear that if I start displaying them I will lose control. Of course, I'm not the only one who has problems to contend with. Fortunately, most of my team know how to deal with their problems and move on. Stella, Hawkes, Flack, and Lindsay have proven to be quite resilient. Adam and Sid? Well, they're Adam and Sid, and we'll leave it at that.

My concern is Danny Messer. It's always been Danny Messer. I hired him against the advice of his and my superiors and he's been a headache ever since. He's also the best CSI I've hired in the last five years. Why the dichotomy? To put it simply, Danny is a man of science who is from the street, and as such he has a problem with authority. After it became clear to him that he was on the verge of losing his job, he eventually straightened up and has finally matured.

His personal life is another matter. While he was with Lauren, it was obvious that he was in love – he stopped being so moody. Now, he's only moody to one person – Lindsay Monroe. Stella thinks I'm totally clueless when it comes to love, only because I've chosen not to date since my wife died, but I still know a thing or two about the human mating dance. While I'm sitting the dance out by choice – quite successfully, might I add – Danny's head and heart are fighting. His head wants to be on the sidelines while his heart wants to two-step, so between the two, you can imagine how much of an ass he's looking like these days.

It wasn't lost on any of us that Lindsay was Danny's type; we just didn't know how he would react when _he_ figured it out. Unfortunately, he decided to take the low road and act like a brat, blaming her for Lauren's perceived faults.

Lindsay is a different kind of woman; she's tough and very loyal, so I really don't see her bailing on anyone when the going gets tough. I empathize with him (I really do feel his pain), but the way he treats Lindsay is unacceptable.

According to Flack, Aiden had a talk with Lindsay and Danny separately and they're both in denial. At least they're getting along better – by that I mean they're speaking to each other. How long will it take for Danny to acknowledge his real feelings for Lindsay, and how will she react?

Whatever the answers to those questions are, things are bound to get interesting around here.

**Next: Lindsay's Hurt**


	11. Linday's Hurt

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

Thanks to Andrea, GermanGirl, CSI Junkie, Hayley, and J, who so kindly reviewed various chapters. I try to reply to everyone who reviews, but I can't reply to those who aren't signed in, but I do accept and appreciate all reviews :) Thank you all (including those named above) for continuing to read and review this story!

**Summary:** Lindsay's Hurt

**Chapter 11**

"Lindsay! Open up!" A sense of urgency was present in Hannah's voice.

Lindsay wiped the tears from her eyes as she slowly approached the door to unlock it.

"Oh, Lindsay, what happened?" Hannah took in her friend's appearance and demeanor and knew that something was terribly wrong. Lindsay was barely holding herself together when she called her friend to come over.

"He…he…he called me names and grabbed me!"

"Who did this to you, Linds? Did you call the police?"

Lindsay's eyes flew open as she protested, "NO! No police, please!"

"Who did this to you?" Hannah demanded.

"Stephen," she choked out.

"My friend Stephen? Are you serious? I'm going to kill him! What happened?"

**CSI:NY**

_Lindsay was surprised when Stephen showed up at her door unannounced, but she didn't think twice about letting him in._

"_Where were you, Lindsay? I tried to call you and all I got was your voicemail." He was standing very close to her, using his proximity and size to intimidate her._

_Lindsay stepped back before she answered. "I went out with some friends, that's all."_

_He kept pace with her, making sure he could reach her at all times. "What friends?" _

_Lindsay could tell that Stephen was getting more upset and she knew that when he got like this, there was nothing she could do to calm him down._

"_Does it matter? Look, why don't you go home and we can talk about it in the morning. Okay?"_

"_No, it's not okay." He was talking through clenched teeth at this point. "Who were you with?"_

_Lindsay backed up some more until she bumped into her sofa. _

"_Stephen, you need to calm down!"_

_He glared at her, signifying that he was not leaving or doing anything else until he was ready. He reached out, grabbed her arms, and shook her._

"_Who were you with?"_

"_Aiden and Flack and Danny!"_

"_What, you going out with other men now? I'm not good enough for you? You're a slut!"_

"_Stop it, Stephen, you're hurting me!" His fingers were wrapped so tightly around her arms that she knew she was going to have bruises._

"_You're__ hurting? __I'm__ hurting! You go out with all of these different men and you're telling me that __you're__ hurting?"_

_He loosened his grip on her arms just as she fell backwards on the sofa where her purse was. She managed to turn it over and her gun fell out. Although she was on her back, she pointed it at his head as he stood above her and had enough control to steadily take aim with her finger on the trigger._

"_GET OUT!"_

_Stephen backed up a step while he assessed the situation – could he really overpower an armed police officer? Was it worth the risk? He backed up with his hands up at the elbows, obviously hating her for turning the tables on him, but having no choice but to concede and exit._

_As he backed out the door he spat out, "You're not worth it anyway!" and slammed the door behind him._

_Lindsay didn't move for a few minutes, until she knew for sure he wasn't returning. She lay on her back, gun poised at the spot where she last saw Stephen's head. When she was confident that he would not return, she hurried to the door to lock it, never releasing the gun from her grip. She even held it as she called Hannah, Stella, and Aiden to come to her._

**CSI:NY**

Now, Lindsay held onto the gun to keep it out of Hannah's hands. She believed her when she said that she was going to kill him.

Stella and Aiden showed up a few minutes later, Stella arrived first, and Aiden afterward. Lindsay retold the story to each of the ladies as soon as they came, so a little bit of the shock had worn off after telling the story for the third time.

Aiden paced back and forth chanting, "I knew he was an abuser!"

Hannah was on the phone trying to find out how to lodge a complaint against Stephen so that his license would be revoked, but Lindsay's refusal to call the cops would, in the long run, be a hindrance to the process.

Stella, having been through a situation that was all too familiar, spoke words of compassion and encouragement that only a fellow survivor could utter. Eventually, she persuaded her to press charges against him, if only to take her power back.

The police officers came and went, and Lindsay was grateful that Stella had the forethought to bring her kit and camera with her so that she could document Lindsay's bruises. She knew that even though her friend processed her, by pressing charges, her coworkers would find out what happened to her, and though she knew that she shouldn't feel embarrassed, she was anyway. She made her friends promise not to talk about this to anyone, knowing that it would all be in the open eventually.

**Next: Danny Finds Out About Stephen**


	12. Danny Finds Out

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**Chapter 12: Danny finds out about Stephen**

"What's up, Montana?" Danny called to Lindsay brightly as he approached her in the corridor of the lab. He noticed that she looked nervous and moved away from him as he approached her.

"You alright?"

Lindsay could tell he was concerned, but she was still shaken from her experience a few days prior. Fortunately for her, Stella talked to Mac on her behalf because she didn't feel as if it was fair for him not to be aware of the situation; she didn't want him to hear about it second-hand. He let her have a few days off so that she could deal with what had happened to her.

"Montana? What's wrong?" He moved in closer to her as he grew more concerned by her seeming distraction.

Lindsay blinked a couple of times while struggling to attend to Danny.

"Sorry, I have a lot on my mind. Did you need anything?"

He continued to look at her suspiciously because she most certainly was not alright, but he could not put his finger on the emotions that she was trying to hide. Was she angry? Hurt? Embarrassed? He never did find out why she had taken the last few days off.

"You get enough sleep?"

A fake grin appeared and she said, "No, like I said, I have a lot on my mind. Kept me up most of the night."

Still not ready to let her go, he said, "If you need someone to talk to, let me know, okay?"

She forced a smile, turned away from him, and continued walking down the hall while he watched her retreat. He stood in the same spot until Hawkes walked behind him and spoke.

"Too bad what happened to Lindsay, huh? I almost had to throw myself on top of Hannah to keep her from going out to kill him. Not that I'd complain about…"

"What happened to Lindsay? Who did something to her? Was it Stephen?" With every question, he became hotter and madder.

"You don't know? Maybe I wasn't supposed to tell you…" Hawkes was suddenly cursing himself for having such a big mouth. Just because Danny and Lindsay were getting along better didn't mean that she wanted him to know about her darkest moments.

Danny's eyes belied the fact that he was upset and he wasn't about to let Hawkes go without telling him everything he knew.

"Out with it, Hawkes!"

Just then, Mac came along and told Hawkes that he needed him to go to a scene with him immediately. Hawkes was relieved that he was saved from having to tell of Lindsay's abuse.

* * *

_Where is she? _ He made his way to their shared office and found it to be empty. _Next stop, locker room_. He entered the locker room, and when he rounded the corner he saw Lindsay sitting on the bench in front of her locker. She was slumped forward, holding her head in her hands. She didn't seem to be crying, but her posture was one of defeat. He didn't say a word, he just positioned himself in front of her and crouched down.

"Lindsay," he said softly. She didn't move or say anything.

"Lindsay, I know that I haven't always been a friend to you, but I need you to trust that I am one now. I can't just walk away from you knowing that something or someone has caused you so much pain. I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what happened." He spoke softly but resolutely, then he reached out to touch her shoulders just waiting for her to feel ready to open up to him, or to at least allow him to offer her comfort.

"Danny," she started with a weak and broken voice. She raised her head and she saw the intense concern in his eyes. She never would have thought that Danny would be so interested in her well-being.

She cleared her throat and continued, "Danny, a few nights ago, Stephen and I broke up." She hoped that would appease him.

"Is that it?" She could tell that he expected more of an explanation.

She lowered her head again.

"Lindsay, was it an amicable breakup?" he prodded.

She shook her head. She was thankful that she was past crying over this, but she was far from being over it.

"What happened, Lindsay? Did he hurt you?"

She nodded slowly, still unable to look him in the eye. She could hear his breathing become strained due to the anger he felt.

He took a deep, labored breath before he continued. "Did you report it?"

She nodded.

"Good," he said tersely. "You did good. What did he do to you?"

She inhaled and again raised her head to look at Danny and spoke slowly. "It wasn't that bad, Danny. He just grabbed me and shook me."

"What do you mean 'just'? Geez, Montana, don't tell me you're making excuses for this loser. He hurt you." He stood up straight and walked a few steps away from her.

"I'm gonna kill him," he said through clenched teeth.

"Danny, no! It's taken care of. I filed charges. Hannah's going to help me file a complaint so that he can lose his board certification, and she has a restraining order to keep him from the office they shared. Please, Danny!"

He turned back to her and said, "I _knew_ he was trouble. Just something about him was…off. I _knew_ he was no good for you. Damn it! _I'm gonna kill him!_"

Lindsay stood up and walked over to him and spoke quietly. "Danny, the best way you can help me is to be here for me when I need you. You can't do that if you're in jail." She cocked an eyebrow up at him and smiled a little. "What if I need a hug one day? You can't hug me through a glass partition, and I don't accept collect calls from correctional facilities. Sorry, but that's one of my rules."

She smiled. She could tell that he was beginning to calm down a bit.

"Now, about that hug. I could use one now."

He was a bit surprised by her request, but he obliged. He had vowed to never hug her or touch her, for fear he might forfeit all of the strength it took to deny how he felt about her. It turned out that his fears were founded. Once his arms were around her, he didn't want to let her go. He closed his eyes and rested his cheek on her head. He began to rub her back and he could feel her relax into him.

He whispered, "Don't worry, Montana, I'm not going anywhere."

When they finally broke apart, they could barely look at each other without blushing. Both felt as if they had crossed into new territory.

_What am I doing? Lindsay's not gonna go for me after the way I treated her. She knows that I have a bit of a temper, so I'll probably just scare her off. But I'd never ever hit her, that much I know._

_I can't believe I asked him for a hug. Well, it felt good being in his arms. What am I saying? I've just ended a bad relationship – I shouldn't be having these thoughts. It's too soon for that. Besides, it's _Danny_. There's no way he thinks of me that way. I don't care what Aiden says. She couldn't be right, could she?_

**Next: The Roller Derby**


	13. The Roller Derby

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

Thanks to all of my reviewers, including germangirl and Hayley.

**Chapter 13: The Roller Derby**

As Lindsay polished her toenails, she thought about how her relationship with Danny had changed over the past couple of months since their hug. They enjoyed each other's company, and it never ceased to amaze their coworkers how well they got along. They treated each other to lunch and, unbeknownst to their colleagues, to dinner as well. They teased each other mercilessly, and sometimes one or the other couldn't take it, but they never stayed on the outs for too long. He even let her choose the radio station on the way to crime scenes.

He had never explicitly asked for forgiveness. She had never explicitly told him that she had granted it to him. There was no better fodder for teasing than the way they had previously gotten along. She laughed and he winced at the unfortunate way he had treated her. He never came clean about why he treated her the way he did, and she didn't ask. She was afraid that Aiden's assessment of the situation was right, but she was even more afraid that she was wrong.

Lindsay grew to depend on Danny when she had rough days. It still amazed her that she could turn to a man for comfort when it was a _man_ who had harmed her. But Danny was different somehow. As nurturing as Stella could be, _Danny _was the one she called when she was afraid to be alone. As understanding as Hawkes was, _Danny_ was the one she called when she tried to make sense of why she chose to ignore the signs that Stephen was abusive. As funny as Flack was, _Danny_ was the one she called when she needed a pick-me-up.

Now, she was pretty sure that the flutters in her stomach whenever they touched meant that her feelings about him were changing, and if he gave her the right signs, she was not going to deny them.

**CSI:NY**

The phone rang just as Lindsay applied the last stroke of polish on her big toe. The brush slipped and left an errant streak on the side of her toe. Ignoring the stain, she reached over to her nightstand to retrieve her phone. _I'll clean it up later._

"Hello."

"_Lindsay?"_

Her heart quickened when she heard his voice.

"Danny. What's up? She tried to sound non-chalant.

"_I was wondering if you feel up to going out with some of us tonight."_

"Where to?"

"_The roller derby._

"Are you serious?"

"_Yeah. We thought we'd check it out. "_

"I'd love to."

"_Great. I'll stop by around six, okay? Watch some women work out their aggression. Who knows, you might find a new way to release some of yours."_

"You wish, Messer."

**CSI:NY**

There was lots of screaming, swearing, jumping, and fist pumping that night, along with a few bets made between the friends on who would lead each round. Before they headed home, Lindsay had approached one of the team's coaches to find out how she could participate in the sport. By the time she finished, all of her coworkers had left, except for Danny. When she walked over to him, he looked at her curiously.

"What do you think you're doing?

"What?" She looked up at him with a smile, but Danny held the grim look on his face.

"Talking to the coach. What was that about?"

"I've been looking for a fun way to exercise and this might fit the bill. I, too, have aggression that I need to get out," she cheekily explained. She grinned and tossed her hair over her shoulder dramatically before she turned to walk away from him, prompting him to follow behind her. When she got to the exit and reached out to open the door, he put his hand on her shoulder to turn her around gently. She saw that his attitude had changed to one of concern.

"Lindsay, I'm serious. You saw how brutal that game was, why would you want to subject yourself to that?"

"Well, I'm not a stranger to getting beaten up anymore, so what's the big deal?" Danny did not return her smile.

"Not funny, Monroe," he said as he opened the door and walked out, not bothering to hold the door open for her, but she caught it just in time and followed him to the edge of the parking lot.

"Lighten up, Messer. If I can make a joke about this, you should be able to." Her light-heartedness was quickly draining away from her.

There they stood in the dark parking lot, watching the derby players leave the arena in groups of two or three, their demeanor much more relaxed than it had been before. A few of them eyed Danny and Lindsay and were eager to get away from the tension that they exuded. They had skated and bullied away the tedium of their jobs and the frustration they had incurred by living another day, and they had no intention of taking on someone else's angst.

"Danny, do you remember when you told me that I might find a new way to release some of my aggression? That got me to thinking – why can't I do this? It looks like fun."

"There are other ways of releasing aggression – safer ways."

"What do you suggest?" She was getting quite impatient with him.

A mischievous grin slowly spread across his face.

"There are _natural _ways that won't leave any scars if done right."

Lindsay blushed and cocked her head to the side; she didn't feel the need to respond, as she was sure her facial expression said everything she felt.

"_What?_" he asked innocently.

He was rewarded when she began laughing.

"I _cannot_ believe you just said that!"

"Well? Gotta be better than getting an elbow to the face, right?"

Lindsay couldn't believe that she was actually having this conversation with Danny. A couple of months ago she couldn't even fathom the idea of willingly socializing with him, let alone having _this_ kind of conversation. What's more, she wasn't turned off by it. On the contrary, she was sort of turned on; she decided to flirt a little.

She smiled innocently and said, "Yeah, it's better – if it's done right."

That was the encouragement that Danny needed to pursue the conversation.

"So, are you going to be one of those girls with a skimpy outfit who bulldozes her way to the finish line?"

"I haven't decided yet. I don't think I have another option, so I'll need to buy some knee pads and elbow pads…and a skimpy little outfit."

"While I'd _never _discourage you from wearing a skimpy little outfit, just remember that you will _always_ have other options." The look in his eye was unmistakable. He was definitely turned on and ready to make his move.

"Oh, really? I haven't had any offers in a very long time, so…"

"There's always an offer on the table." He walked closer to her; they both knew what was coming…

**Next: Life According to Lindsay and Danny**


	14. Life According to Lindsay and Danny

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**THIS IS THE FINAL CHAPTER. Thank you for your reviews. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**Chapter 14: Life According to Lindsay and Danny**

"Just thinking about our first kiss gives me goosebumps. Watching you approach me – it seemed as if everything was happening in slow motion."

"The way you looked at me as if you needed me."

"Your blue eyes were fixed upon me. The way you cradled my face and leaned my head back."

"And the minute our lips touched…I couldn't tell where my lips ended and yours began. All that I knew was that you were the most important thing in my life."

"You made me feel that way, too. And you still do. I knew that I'd never want to kiss another man. It was magical. We've been inseparable since then. Needless to say, I have never donned a skimpy little outfit…"

"Unfortunately…Ouch! That hurt!"

"…nor did I get a chance to work out my aggression in a skating rink. Actually, all I have to do to release any pent-up aggression is call or see Danny. My day is instantly brighter."

"Awww, thanks, Babe."

"You're welcome, my fuzzy wuzzy bear."

"Montana, stop that! What did I tell you about calling me that in front of strangers?"

"Ummm…you said you like it?"

"Not quite."

"Don't get mad. So, are you going to tell these folks what happened next?"

"Nah, let 'em wait for the one-shot sequel."

A/N: **THERE IS A ONE-SHOT FOLLOW-UP TO THIS STORY THAT WILL BE POSTED SHORTLY. I will continue to add to this story, but I haven't started it - I don't even have a title yet; I will add the parts of the story that come between Chapter 14 of this story and the follow up that will be posted in the next couple of days. If I've confused you, sorry. I just started a new job (fortunately within my field) so I'm REALLY busy right now. ****Just hang tight! **


	15. Life According to Lindsay

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**A/N:**I said it was over. I lied.

**Summary:**Lindsay tells her story

**Chapter 15: Life According To Lindsay**

All I wanted was a new place to call home – a new city, new friends, and new experiences. I got so much more than I anticipated, including a great job and a great boyfriend. I didn't come to New York looking for a boyfriend, and he actually turned out to be the last person I expected to like, let alone fall in love with.

When I first came to New York, I knew that I had to be tough, but I couldn't totally leave my Montana upbringing behind. Not only am I polite, but some would say that I have a wide-eyed innocence. I _hate_ it when people say that about me, as if I my life didn't start until I came to New York and I grew up insulated from wicked acts. I've seen the results of _lots_ of wicked acts and I have been changed, but I'm not jaded. Well, not totally.

When I moved here, I had a realistic yet positive outlook that was appreciated by everyone I met. Everyone, that is, except for Danny Messer. I tried my best to win him over, but, you know what? I soon realized that it wasn't worth it and I gave up. If he wanted to be a miserable bastard he was free to do so. He rejoiced in my displeasure. I hoped he would fall off of the face of the Earth, because other than my experience with him, I loved being in New York – it was everything I hoped it would be. I decided to ignore him, even though there's really no way to do that, seeing that he's the loudest and most obnoxious person in our unit. Sharing an office with him has never been easy and I've had to listen to too many of his one-sided telephone conversations while he went on and on with his friends about something or the other that he seemed a bit too amused by. Sometimes it was childish pranks, his mother's mozzarella, his latest foot pursuit, or his college conquests of the female variety (which I'm sure were greatly exaggerated).

I refused to go to Mac about the way I was being treated. What kind of police officer complains about a fellow officer? Hazing was supposed to go with the territory. But this was far more than hazing. I didn't know what I did to raise his ire, but it seemed as if he had it out for me from day one, which is when he first stuck me with the moniker 'Montana.' Could he have been anymore unwelcoming? Not hardly.

I counted my blessings, knowing that my life would not be perfect. I didn't seek out Danny's company and I certainly didn't want to be his friend. I had enough _good_friends, so I wasn't desperate enough to try to win _him_ over.

Among my friends was Dr. Sheldon Hawkes. He's not only a man's man, he's also a woman's man. He sure swept my friend Hannah off of her feet. Many people think he's one-dimensional, a nice guy with no rough edges. If they got to know him they would know the other side of him, the side that takes no bull, also the ladies' man part of him. No, he's not the love 'em and leave 'em type, but he's had his share of romances. He's no choir boy, as I've heard of his raunchy sense of humor, though not in mixed company. You'll have to ask Flack about that. But you can't find a better friend than Sheldon. He's always there for support, rooting for the little guy. He can become quite defensive if he feels as if his friends are being threatened. He's very loyal, but he has some bite.

I think that's what Hannah saw in him. She's always been very focused, much like Hawkes, but she has a wild side, too. She likes to have fun. Back in Montana she got me into quite a bit of trouble in her quest to have fun. There was that one time that our sorority got put on probation because of a stunt she pulled, but I'd rather not go into the details. I still remember having to explain that to my parents. I had to come home every weekend for the next semester. Not…fun…at…all.

Having Hannah living in New York was just what I needed since at the time I was feeling like an outcast, thanks to Danny. There's nothing like having a shared history with someone to make you feel as if you belong. She's always been feisty, and after the nightmare that I went through with Stephen, I was sure I was going to have to bail her out of jail. For that matter, I thought I'd have to bail out Danny, too, but I'll get to that later.

Flack – my friend, Don Flack. What can I say about him? He's as honest as they come. It's not in his nature to hold his tongue, and even if he does, his true feelings are written all over his face. You'll never know how much Don made me feel protected and valued the night he stood up for me to Danny. He doesn't know how to do anything but the right thing. That's part of his heritage.

Stella was my rock after the whole 'Stephen' debacle. If it hadn't been for her, I'm sure I would not have filed charges against him. There's something about experiencing pain that makes for a strong bond, and we've had a special connection ever since. After everything she had been through, she still came to my aid and encouraged me to fight. If I had been through half of what she's been through in my lifetime, I would probably be curled up in a fetal position day and night.

Aiden Burn – the woman whom I thought was Danny's girlfriend is… Well, how can Aiden be described? She's funny, hard, stubborn, generous, loyal… Need I say more? Although she's not still a part of the team, she's still a part of the team. Who wouldn't want her on their side?

Aiden is really the one who started all of this. I was living my life, perfectly happy holding Danny Messer in contempt, until she decided to plant the seed in my head that he was in love with me. _What???_ There was nothing in his demeanor or his words that led me to believe that he felt anything for me but disgust. Being a scientist, I know to look for evidence, and boy, did I have evidence: he humiliated me, he was rude to me, and he ignored me. Yep. Classic signs of being in love.

I hated being assigned to work with him. When he wasn't ignoring me, he was dismissing my theories and scrutinizing my work. I decided that I should return the favor, and as it turned out, he didn't like getting a taste of his own medicine.

I avoided him at all costs because it's against my nature to be so cold to people, especially my workmates. Of course, if something happened to him, such as Mac getting mad at him for one of his crazy antics, I _did_ get some joy from it.

When Aiden invited me to lunch, I had no idea what she wanted to talk about. A woman-to-woman chat was not what I had in mind. _That_ woman-to-woman chat was definitely not what I had in mind. I could have dealt with a 'stay away from my man' conversation much more easily than I could deal with a 'Danny's in love with you' conversation. That was so far removed from my reality that it was almost funny. It would have been funny if it wasn't so scary.

When we parted ways, I thought that Aiden was nice, but nuts. I only went out with her later that evening to appease her because she wouldn't leave me alone. I also wanted her to see that Danny's dislike for me was not a ruse. As it turned out, Danny and I wound up having a pretty civil conversation _and_ we danced together – somewhat. I didn't want to get too close to him and he didn't want to get too close to me. An onlooker would have thought we were strangers, our proximity only a consequence of circumstance. Danny and I had a bit of light-hearted conversation that seemed to quell a lot of the tension between us. I began to see another side of him.

Shortly after that, things with Stephen went irrevocably sour. He had become increasingly jealous over time, but I chose to ignore the signs. That was one of the reasons I hesitated to file charges against him – I should have seen this coming. At my party he acted so jealous when any of my male coworkers, _including Mac_, spoke to me. That was embarrassing. I know that everyone noticed. Aiden had even tried to warn me about him, but I still chose to live in denial. Looking back I'm just grateful that I had the presence of mind to protect myself when I needed to.

After that, even though I wanted to keep what happened quiet, it got out and I had support from everyone, including Danny. When he found out he was livid. I could tell that he wanted to hunt Stephen down and hurt him, but he exercised restraint. He didn't react violently by punching a wall or anything like that. That would have very likely been a turnoff for me. I asked him for a hug to calm him and myself down, but that was the beginning of the end for both of us. At that point, I think we had both been in denial about the way we felt about each other. I didn't feel as if I had a right to have those feelings for him since I had just gone through all of that with Stephen. In hindsight I can see that I was ready because I had already distanced myself from Stephen emotionally.

Anyway, when we hugged, all bets were off. I knew that something was different between us. I didn't want him to let me go and I held on to him as if my life depended on it.

After that, we would hang out with the rest of the gang, but unbeknownst to the others we would also hang out with each other - just the two of us. We got closer and got to know each other, so I didn't think anything of it when he invited me to the roller derby. I sat next to Danny, as I often wound up doing. He would sometimes brush his hand against my arm, but I wouldn't let myself believe that he was doing it on purpose. I secretly relished every touch on my bare skin, and the touches seemed to increase in frequency. They were just a by-product of us sitting next to each other, right? I'll never forget that during the roller derby he rested his arm along the back of my chair. I thought that he was just relaxing, but he rubbed my shoulder with his hand and when he had to tell me something he'd get very close to me. Of course I returned the favor.

After the match was over, I approached the coach to ask him about joining his team. What can I say? It looked like fun. I didn't expect the fallout from Danny, but I could see that he was not happy when I finished talking with the coach. I didn't like arguing with him, but it was kind of sweet how concerned he was for my well-being. I already knew how my experience with Stephen had upset him, but I didn't know that he was still holding on to it that tightly.

When we made it to the parking lot, he made me an offer that I couldn't refuse. I could see his face inching toward me and I made no effort to move away or to stop him. It was about time. When I felt his lips touch mine, I felt that feeling – you know that feeling. I couldn't believe that we had the same pent-up feelings for each other that we released in one kiss. I suddenly understood just how important my safety was to him, and _why_ it was so important. It wasn't just passion in that kiss. It was something a lot less fleeting.


	16. Life According to Danny

**Life According To…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; this is simply my imagination put to paper.**

**A/N: **THIS is the final chapter (I think).

**Summary: **Danny tells his story

**Chapter 16: Life According To Danny**

Did I really have any choice? I mean, she comes to New York from _Montana,_ of all places, with her sickeningly happy demeanor and trying to be Mac's toady. Sure she was cute; I never said she wasn't.

I guess I have to admit that I was quite mean to her from day one, starting by calling her 'Montana.' I didn't plan to be so mean to her, _I swear._ I didn't understand it myself, so I couldn't explain it. It was frustrating feeling so out of control around her. I was confused by her and the way I reacted to her. At the end of the day I wasn't proud of myself for the way I treated her – although I did get a good one in every now and then.

For example, I _might_ have been a _little_ underhanded by inviting myself to Lindsay's party, but I had to lay my eyes on the jerk – I mean the _guy –_ who was going out with her. I never would have known about the party if it wasn't for Hawkes. I can't be sure, but I'm beginning to think that his accidental 'slip' wasn't so accidental. I'm gonna have to grill him about that. Anyway, I had Aiden with me, whom I forgot to tell that I wasn't _really_ invited. (She wasn't too happy when she found out.) The look on Montana's face when we showed up was priceless, and then I pretended that I was hurt that she didn't invite me. Classic!

**CSI:NY**

So I finally got to meet the guy that Lindsay had been raving about and I've got to say that I wasn't impressed. I knew when I laid eyes on him that something was off about him and Aiden saw it too. He was definitely someone to keep an eye on. He wasn't good enough for her anyway. I didn't realize that I played my hand in front of Aiden, of all people when I kind of went off about how Steven wasn't Lindsay's type. It was then that I realized that I couldn't deny to anyone or to myself how I felt about her. I didn't get any sleep that night. For the first time in a long time I allowed myself to think about Lauren and what we had. For the longest time I was bitter towards her for leaving, but I always knew deep down that she was in an impossible situation and I think I made it more about whether she felt I could protect her or not. The fact is that I don't know if I could have and I never would have forgiven myself if something had happened to her. In the end she did the right thing for herself; I can't blame her for wanting to be safe.

I was so busy being bitter that I didn't realize that I had gotten over her. I mean, I really did love her, but at some point I was ready to move on. I don't know when that happened, but I know that by the time Lindsay showed up, I was already primed and ready to go. If it wasn't for the bitterness that I held onto I would have been open to at least being friends with her. (Don't think I've gone soft - I've had a few talks with Hannah so I have a bit more insight. She wouldn't leave me alone until she got a crack at my thick head. Her words, not mine.)

**CSI:NY**

I made plans with Aiden and Flack to go dancing as we do every so often. The plan hit a snag when they told me that Aiden had invited Lindsay. Now don't think I forgot how Flack called me out in front of the whole team at The Blue Room (I've come to accept that I _might_ have deserved it), so I wasn't too keen on being in his and Montana's presence. When they arrived at my apartment they cornered me and tried to get me to admit that I had feelings for Lindsay. They should have known better than that. I was a bitter man in denial and was in no mood to concede anything. The only thing I agreed to was that I would be civil towards Montana, which meant, among other things, that I wouldn't call her 'Montana.'

The night wasn't so bad. Things were awkward between us, especially when Flack and Aiden left us alone to go dance. Eventually I decided that it wouldn't kill me to dance with her. I could not have been more wrong. She was _killing _me. Understand? Just seeing her move and gyrate to the music made me forget the bitterness I was holding on to. It's not as if she was the only woman dancing like that in the room, but she was the only woman that I saw. At that moment, something changed between us and I was sure she felt it too.

From that day on, we were inseparable. Nobody knew about the time we spent together away from the team, just the two of us. I was afraid to try to take it to the next level. I pride myself in being suave, but when I'm around her I turn into a third grader. I probably would have sent her a note that said, "Do you like me? Circle Yes or No." I couldn't go out like a sucker, so I waited until the moment was right.

I didn't invite Lindsay to the roller derby with the intention of kissing her. We were just going to hang out with our friends to let off some steam. But during the game I couldn't help but touch her soft skin. It had become a habit. I tried to do it innocently, but at some point 'innocent' went out the window and I just wanted to cop a feel. I was still feeling very protective of her, and she didn't seem to mind. After our argument about whether or not she should become a roller derby player, we flirted a little and I took the opportunity that she gave me to let her know how I felt.

I know you think that I forgot to talk about what happened with Steven. I wanted to save that for last. He didn't just drop out of sight, at least not out of _my _sight. I kept an eye on him and I waited. He didn't know what hit him, or shall I say _who_ hit him. I still know a couple of moves from the old neighborhood and I put them to good use in that alley. Of course, I couldn't let Lindsay know what I did to that jerk-off because I didn't want her to think that I would ever hit _her_. I know how her mind works. So let this be a secret between us, alright?

Anyway, who would have thought that I would have found the love of my life? Who would have thought my Montana could ever love a guy like me? She does and I can walk taller knowing that I'm loved by her.


End file.
